IT IS CONSTANT heartbreak for the surrogate mother in the “Bring Carmen Home” case, because she sees herself as the mother of a girl she has no genetic connection with and whose legal custody is in the hands of the baby’s gay biological father.

“I have tried in vain to cut any [emotional] ties with this girl,” Patidta Kusolsang said yesterday during an interview with Nation TV. “I am worried for her because I feel I’m her mum.”

Gordon Lake, an American, fathered Carmen via a paid surrogacy service. While Patidta served as the surrogate mother, the egg came from another woman.

Since giving birth to Carmen and handing over the baby to Lake early last year, Patidta has refused to sign the papers required for the foreign father to take his daughter out of Thailand.

Patidta’s stance prompted Lake to wage the “Bring Carmen Home” campaign and a legal battle to win sole custody of the girl.

Lake and his legal partner, Spanish national Manuel Santos, have practically stayed put in Thailand – despite the risk of losing their jobs, and more, in Spain – since Carmen’s birth, because they refuse to leave her behind.

On Monday, the homosexual couple won a victory as the Central Juvenile and Family Court awarded sole custody of Carmen to Lake.

Patidta yesterday said she would consult her lawyer as to how to proceed further, because no matter how much she tried not to, she kept worrying about Carmen.

“I am a human. I feel attached to the baby I carried for nine months during the pregnancy. It’s hard to accept that I will not be able to see or hear from her,” the surrogate mother said, her voice shaking with emotion.

Patidta said that since Carmen’s birth, she had been able to see the baby just twice. She lamented that Lake should not be allowed to cut ties between her and Carmen.

“Why should I lose contact with my girl?” she said. “Which mother would agree to let her daughter live far away from her? Which mother would agree not to find out how her baby was doing?”

Patidta said she had never talked to Lake during the past several months, and she was not sure whether he was willing to negotiate.

“I don’t want his money. I just care about my daughter,” she stressed.

She also revealed that she was planning to write a book about being a surrogate mother, in order to remind other women that they should not just jump into surrogacy without first getting enough information. The court awarded sole custody of Carmen to Lake, recognising his care and love for the girl, who has lived with him since her birth. Custody is not shared between Lake and Patidta since they will eventually be living in different countries.

At present, there are 63 medical facilities in Thailand that provide assisted reproductive technology services like surrogacy. All of them, however, now operate in line with the new law governing such use of technology, which became effective last July.

According to the new law, surrogacy services can only be provided in the Kingdom to married heterosexual couples. At least one member of the couple must also be Thai in order to be able to request such services. The purchase of egg and sperm for such services is banned, with offenders facing up to 10 years in jail and a fine of Bt200,000.

 

THE BABY GIRL at the centre of the Bring Carmen Home Campaign has legally been put under the care of her biological father, a gay foreigner who made touching efforts over the past 15 months to keep her with him.

Recognising his love and care for the girl, the Central Juvenile and Family Court yesterday awarded sole custody of the 15-month-old baby to Gordon Lake.

The court also took into account the fact that the girl’s Thai surrogate mother had not objected to Lake’s request for sole custody during court hearings.

Lake fathered Carmen through surrogacy services, with Patidta Kusolsang paid to serve as surrogate mother. The egg came from another woman.

Lake is legally married to a Spanish man, Manuel Santos.

“Lake has taken care of the girl since her birth, with love,” the court said, “He is gay. But his homosexuality is not an obstacle in raising the girl up amid happiness and warmth”.

The court did not order shared custody because Patidta lives in Thailand, while Lake plans to take Carmen to Spain, where his family has lived.

Santos has fathered one son via surrogacy services in India.

The court said yesterday that for Carmen’s utmost benefit, sole custody should be granted to Lake.

Although the law protecting children born via reproductive technology assistance now bans surrogacy services for gay couples, the court formed its ruling based on the fact Carmen was born before the law took effect last year.

Santos shred tears of happiness upon hearing the court verdict. “I would like to thank the court and all Thais. I am glad we have won,” he said. He wore a white T-shirt emblazon with the words: “Finally, Love Won. Thank You Thailand @twogaypapas #Bringcarmenhome”.

Rachapol Sirikulchit, lawyer for the gay couple, said from now on, further action would be taken to ensure that Carmen can live smoothly with her family.

Lake was not present at the court yesterday when the verdict was read, as he is currently overseas. But he is due to fly back shortly.

Since Carmen was born, the foreign couple has remained in Thailand as they refused to leave their daughter behind.

Lake said he had been unable to take Carmen back to his home in Spain because Patidta refused to sign papers needed for the trip.

The two Spaniards launched a ‘Bring Carmen Home’ campaign and won much public support. The campaign’s Facebook page has had more than 120,000 ‘likes’.

The page was flooded with notes of congratulations yesterday.

One comment said: “I am so glad I almost cried. I am not your relative. But I am so glad and so happy for you…The nightmare has ended for you, papas. May your family enjoy happiness and all the good things from now on.”

Patidta was also not present in the court yesterday.

An informed source said she was likely to appeal but would need time to study the verdict first.

 

Gordon Alan Lake III, an American, and his partner, Spanish national Manuel Santos, have sued Patidta Kusolsang and Weeratai Maneenuchnet for allegedly suggesting during TV interviews last year that the couple engaged in human trafficking. Patidta carried the child for the couple under a surrogacy contract, but refused to hand her over.

“The comments may damage the reputation of the plaintiffs and subject them to hatred,” the court announced yesterday.

However, the court refused to take action over the allegation that the defendants committed computer crimes after their comments were went viral online.

“At this point, it remains unclear whether the defendants have posted the comments online themselves,” the court said.

Santos, speaking via an interpreter, said he would consult his lawyer as to whether he should pursue charges related to computer crimes against Patidta.

Santos and Lake spent more than Bt1 million on surrogacy services.

However, after Patidta delivered the baby, named Carmen, she refused to sign the papers needed for the gay couple to take the child out of Thailand.

Lake is the biological father of Carmen, who was born in January last year, while the egg came from an anonymous donor.

Since her birth, Carmen has been living with Lake, who has stayed put in Thailand as he has waged legal battle to win custody of his daughter.