Baitoey, famed for her bust size and short shorts (hardly the traits of a wispy ghost) was attempting to shoot a romantic scene on the back of the buffalo with her co-star, heartthrob Martin Midal. The beast turned beastly, though, and they both ended up in the muck.

Baitoey and Martin were whisked from the rice paddy in Song Phi Nong district to a hospital, where they were treated for minor injuries.

At first glance the story’s a puzzle. Why would a docile animal buck Baitoey, who’s after all a farm girl from the Hat Yai outback? Was it her singing? Did the buffalo realise it had a ghost on its back?

In fact what really spooked the critter was a passing band of minstrels. Just as the actors got entwined on buffalo-back and were puckering up for a smooch, a trio playing drum, trumpet and mandolin happened by. It certainly wasn’t in the script – they were on their way to an ordination.

It’s common in Suphan Buri for young men to enter the monkhood for weeks or months to make merit, and ordination ceremonies are big events in every village, celebrated with dancing and musical fanfare.

Well, the buffalo didn’t know this. It came from Si Prachan’s Buffalo Village, a popular destination in the province where urbanites can get a cool selfie with a beast of burden and where the animals are well fed and pampered. This particular buffalo, lured by visions of TV stardom, had probably forgotten what country music sounded like, and there was nothing in its contract about drums and brass. No wonder it went berserk.

As always, someone got the whole episode on video and posted it online. The animal started kicking its hind legs and then bolted, bucking Baitoey into the dirt. Unfortunately she was tied to the buffalo and got dragged a few metres. Martin managed to stay aboard for a few more minutes before he too got dumped, scuttling a prospective rodeo career.

Doctors at the hospital determined that Martin had had a soft enough landing that he wouldn’t need a new set of teeth. Baitoey, though, was treated for symptoms of shock. Being dragged across a rice paddy by a crazed half-tonne bull will have that effect.

Speculation was rife among soap-opera fans that, even if the buffalo wasn’t spooked by a ghost, perhaps Mae Nak at least had a hand in Baitoey’s misfortune. Others reckoned it was just a matter of differing tastes in music, the animal perhaps preferring Bach.

Most folks concur though that Baitoey, with her racy reputation, really shouldn’t be playing the pensive Mae Nak in the first place. Perhaps the buffalo, now a TV veteran, agrees.

 

No, the cops didn’t vow to turn off the water because of the drought. The bash is just postponed until next month.

Dome’s plan to kick off the Thai New Year with a roster of foreign DJ talent, a food and fun fair and, yes, generous lashings of alcohol, ran up against the Chiang MaiCultural Council, which thought it sounded like way too much fun for Songkran.

North Fest, booked from April 13 to 16, was billed as the city’s first full-scale EDM festival, with everything arranged in the northern style and intended to boost Chiang Mai tourism. The local custodians of culture deemed it improper, though, and even “begged” the organisers to reconsider.

Dome did, but rather than cancelling the party outright – which would have cost him and his partners a fortune – he strategically postponed it to May 6 and 7 and dropped the EDM angle, so it’s “just another music festival”.

“My only intention was to promote Chiang Mai among both Thais and foreign tourists as one of the best destinations to celebrate Songkran,” Dome told the press.

“The whole concept had cultural propriety in mind, with our utmost respect to tradition and the local community. We’re also firm about abiding by the law, so only people over 18 would be admitted and alcohol would be served only to people of the legal drinking age.”

Salute to the stars

We’ve been snickering about the male celebrities dodging their duty to spend time in the military, but a couple of other stars are ready to serve. Amid the flurry of excuses both acceptable and ludicrous being offered as per annual tradition this time of year, 25-year-old Thai-French actor Louis Hesse d’Alzon has actually asked to undergo training with the Army.

“Last year I asked for an exemption because I was studying,” Louis said this week. “But I think it’s a great honour and the responsibility of all Thai men to complete this training, so I thought, ‘Why not?’ I’m always looking for ways to serve the country, and this is one, so I’m happy to do it. And I’m very proud to do it because my French grandfather was a soldier.”

Another exemplary star ready to put on the uniform is Kitkong “Boom” Khamkrit, who was the first guy from his district to volunteer. He’ll commence training next month.

“It’s always been my intention to serve our country this way,” Boom told Dara Daily. “I didn’t apply for Reserve Officer Training when I was in high school and I didn’t want to go through the draw. Instead, I made up my mind a long time ago that I’d volunteer.

“Plus, since I’m afraid of heights, I want to overcome my fear and train with the Air Force.”

Well done, gentlemen!

IT’S APRIL. The heat builds to a boil, kites leap at gusts of breeze, the swallows return to Nakhon Ratchasima, and the military starts stuffing reluctant young men into uniform. And the annual conscription season always brings with it the melodrama of young male celebrities doing their best to avoid the call-up.

This year the award for best performance in a recruiting office goes to Chinawut “Chin” Indracusin, who shed tears of desperation because he doesn’t want to interrupt a lucrative double career as an actor and singer.

“I’m not crying because I don’t want to be a soldier,” he blubbered. “I’m worried about my mum and my younger sister.” His parents got divorced when he was a kid. Singing since his teen years, he’s been taking care of Mum and Sis and currently pulls down seven digits a year. Two years in uniform threatened a fiscal wallop worth crying over.

Chin didn’t expect to get drafted on Monday. He arrived at the induction proceedings all smiles, confident he’d be exempted due to the metal plate in his wrist bone, the result of an accident nine years ago. He said that why he’s not as fit and trim as he could be – he doesn’t work out because he doesn’t want to put pressure on the wrist.

Category 3 – the waiver from service – merely chuckled. And, since he’d failed to report for service three years ago, they started fitting him for khaki fatigues immediately. He’ll be in the Army by May 1.

That gives him 25 days to put his civilian responsibilities in order, which includes withdrawing from contracts to appear in two TV series and a movie.

Mike breathing easier

Another singing actor, Pirath “Mike” Nitipaisankul, fared better with the military brass. Obviously asthma is a worthier excuse for avoiding service than a metal wrist. Mike’s affliction is indeed bad – he’s been hospitalised because of it.

Asthma is the go-to get-out-of-duty card for heartthrob Nadech Kugimiya, who dodged the draft two years ago because of it. What riles people about both these guys, though, is they’re not averse to a game of football and can dance around the stage for hours on end.

To be fair, they obey the rules governing their exemptions. They get hospital check-ups that are accredited by the military as well as sworn statements from three different doctors. Also, sports and vigorous leisure activities like dancing don’t pose the same risk as military training since a drill sergeant can’t tell if the recruit’s life is in immediate danger (apart from the routine situations, of course). The Army would need a doctor on standby on the obstacle course.

Mike said he’d suffered from asthma as a child but the symptoms faded, only to reappear last year during Channel 3’s anniversary football match, when he was rushed to hospital. “It’s too bad I don’t have a chance to join the military,” he said almost convincingly. “From now on I’ll do my best to serve the country in other ways.”

They might change their minds if they rode the No 8 bus in Bangkok. And, if they did, they’d probably suggest renumbering the buses to four, which sounds like their word for “death”.

The No 8 buses plying the route between Pak Klongtalad and Happy Land are so accident-prone that the Bangkok Mass Transit Authority has given the operator of the line “one last chance” to improve safety. Otherwise it will yank all the buses off the street, and there are more than 100 of them.

“One last chance” sounds like the Chinese word for “that’ll be the day”, but at least there’s some room for optimism. The passengers refer to their risky rides as “the bus from hell”, “telephone-booth slammers” and “the fast and the furious”, and to themselves as “ghost riders”.

The No 8 easily tops the list of the most dangerous bus lines in Bangkok in the BMTA’s 2015 operating report, based on commuter complaints accumulated over the previous 10 months. The transit authority knows what the problem is and it’s not about the wheels falling off. It all comes down to reckless driving.

Last June, a No 8 slammed into concrete pillar near the Ari Skytrain station when the driver lost control while engaged in a race with a rival bus at breakneck speed. Injury prevented the driver from honouring his contractual obligation to flee the scene before the cops showed up. One morning last week the menace turned truly tragic when a 60-year-old woman was killed in a bus mishap in Lat Phrao.

Even when there are no outright collisions, riding the No 8 can be like enduring an earthquake. The centrifugal motion of sudden swerves tosses passengers out their seats, knocking heads together. Commuters are routinely dropped off in the middle of the road and taken on mystery-tour detours that are anything but magical.

And the conductors are often surly and rude. Earlier this month a young woman posted a terrified selfie on Facebook taken aboard a No 8 between the Lat Phrao subway stop and Chatuchak Park. The young male conductor had sat next to her, ogling her thighs and bumping into her suggestively.

More than 10,000 passengers brave rides on the No 8 every day from eastern to western Bangkok and back. People attempting to defend the service might point out that these are 10-tonne vehicles, not suites at the Ritz-Carlton, so what can you expect?

Let’s reiterate what we expect, then. We expect to get off the bus in one piece.

Misinformation, that great stumbling block of the social networks, had hundreds of fans of the 41-year-old rapper leaving “RIP” comments on his various sharing platforms.

All that happened was that Joey Boy had posted the tragic news that his former sound engineer had been found dead at home. Some of the fans read only the “Joey Boy” and “found dead” parts of the message and concluded that their idol was the one who’d died. Panicked imaginations stoked a wildfire.

Fortunately the newspaper Siam Dara was quick to track Joey down, finding him very much alive and attending a public event. “I laughed about it, actually,” he told them (surely referring to the rumour about him rather than the passing of a colleague).

“In this day and age everything comes and goes so fast and most times people don’t take the time to listen or read carefully before jumping to conclusions,” Joey said evenly. “Most of the time we blame the press for distorting the facts, but there are a lot of cases like this where people don’t pay enough attention when taking in the news. It’s like the whispering game – it starts out as one thing and ends up a completely different down the end of the line.

“I don’t blame anyone and I don’t take offence. But I would like to take this opportunity to offer my condolences to the families of the deceased.”

Joey Boy then took to Instagram with the reassurance that “I’m alive!” He added a series of hashtags including “I posted this myself”, “The deceased used to work with me” and “Respect for the deceased, please”.

Looks familiar

If you wear the same outfit as a diva, you’re obviously her devoted fan. But if a diva dresses like another diva, let battle commence.

Singer-turned-actress Rhatha “Yaya Ying” Phongam inadvertently started a war when she posted a picture on Instagram of herself in the exact same outfit that Pachrapa “Aum” Chaichua had previously worn. In terms of stardom, style icon Aum outranks Yaya, so blood boiled.

We’re talking about simple denim jeans matched with a white cold-shoulder blouse, but that didn’t matter. And it wasn’t a question of who wore it first or better, but who was the bigger star.

Gossip reporters’ ears pricked up as Aum’s fans tore into Yaya Ying, accusing her of stealing their idol’s look. Siam Dara, again quick off the mark, rushed to get Yaya’s response.

“Oh gosh, no, it was never my intention to steal someone’s look, especially Aum’s!” she said. “I would never in a million years dare to try and compete with her. She’s the most fabulous and she’s my idol. I went to an event and the outfit was prepared for me. The stylist matched it up and I had no idea Aum had worn the same outfit.”

Aum has more than a million followers on Instagram and every one of them was gleefully waiting for her reaction. Incredibly, but full credit for coolness, she said not a word.

“Buppha Ratree” was the funny type of horror, about a female ghost making life miserable for the tenants of an old apartment building. Two sequels were made, but neither did nearly as well at the box office, so Yuthlert is having another try, this time with “Buppha Arigato”. It’s due in theatres on May 5.

Yuthlert explains in Hamburger magazine there was a rumour that Somsak “Sia Jiang” Techaratanaprasert of the studio Sahamongkol Film had given up making movies. He went to ask him why. Sia Jiang told him the rumour was a wild exaggeration – he’s only being more careful about which movies he makes.

So Yuthlert pitched a movie – only to remember that the last four films he made for Sahamongkol were flops, collectively costing Sia Jiang around Bt40 million. Fortunately Sia Jiang is always ready to forgive and forget when a project sounds promising, and this idea – about a Thai dying in Japan and haunting folks there – certainly had potential.

Yuthlert wanted to call the picture simply “Arigato” (Japanese for “goodbye”), but Sia Jiang suggested there be some link to “Buppha Ratree”, so they settled on “Buppha Arigato”. Fans of the original shouldn’t expect to see Cherman Boonyasak in the title role again, though. This one stars Suppassara “Kao” Thanachart, whom Yuthlert credits with bringing added sex appeal to the role.

Kao’s co-stars are some of the former child actors from “Fan Chan”, led by Charlie Potjes and Chalermpon “Jack” Thikampornteerawong. It marks the first time they’ve reunited on screen since they were little. Now grown up, they portray friends making a short film while on a trip to Japan. They meet Kao, who’s fled Thailand after killing her boyfriend.

Yuthlert confides that he went through a miserable period after his second child died at birth and could find no inspiration to carry on. He needed a fresh challenge to get his life back on track. The new movie definitely offered challenges, starting with the fact he only had Bt9 million to spend, enough for a local shoot but nowhere near enough for filming in expensive Japan.

So he scrimped and saved as they went along, innovating in his directing techniques and also pulling double duty as cinematographer. The Japan shoot was limited to 20 days and the crew was skeletal, with just six members, counting Yuthlert.

They got the picture finished, he says, and he feels excitement in his life once more, so, after enduring such an awful personal tragedy, he’s ready to move on. We’ll happily be scared all over again if only for his sake.

And last week he was back, visiting the Big Mango from the Big Apple, to show creative types here how it’s done.

Pairoj earned fame in America with his long scroll paintings, done right there on the mean streets, of homeless people, many of them disabled and all of them disadvantaged in some way, yet not a pessimist in the bunch. They’d found their ways to cope. His 2014 exhibition at New York’s New Museum, “Positive Scroll”, was a meaningful success.

“My artwork can’t change the world, but I hope, by example, to uncover the positive side within individuals through the mechanisms of art and unwavering positive engagement,” he said at the time.

Pairoj obtained a bachelor’s in fine art from Silpakorn University in 2007 and four years later moved to New York and joined a group called the Thai Artist Alliance. He did a residency there in 2013 before enrolling at the Academy of Art University in San Francisco in pursuit of a master’s degree.

Now 33, he was back in Bangkok last Sunday for “Art Changes the World”, a project in which he and others worked their magic on the skywalk in front of the Bangkok Art and Culture Centre. He led a new artist collective called Thai Activist in painting portraits of homeless people. Their work quickly found buyers and the money raised was given to the SOS Children’s Village, which provides homes for youngsters who don’t have one.

A lot of the kids were on hand and passers-by paused to gawk as Pairoj and the others rendered marvellous pictures in a few skilful strokes. It took him just minutes to produce an endearing portrait of an elderly man. Nearby, Naphat Kositpipat, whose father is the celebrated artist Chalermchai, seemed able to mimic his technique effortlessly. Silpakorn art students wielded brushes as well, showing admirable dedication.

“I’m so glad to see many people come to support our project,” Pairoj said. “Thank you, brothers and sisters, for helping us reach our goal of helping the children. I’d always hoped to host an event like this and finally my dream’s come true. This powerful project will inspire other artists to help society too.”

Counting five paintings Pairoj had finished previously, in all there were 10 artworks put up for auction. Established artist Somsak Raksuwan, another Silpakorn alumnus, brought the gavel down on a handsome Bt505,000.

“I’d like to see people in society helping each other move,” Pairoj said. “All you have to do is donate a few baht or some food to needy people, or just spend a little free time talking to them, and they’ll be happy – and our society will be happier too.”

Naphat gave Pairoj full credit for prodding others to do something positive. “People might not believe that art can change the world, but it can reflect society’s ills,” he said. “People have cars and enough money to eat, but unprivileged people have nothing. Phi Pok [Pairoj] is different from most Thai artists because his determination to raise social issues comes from Western culture. Today, though, he’s inspired us to care more about what needs to be done.”

Easing the situation – or complicating it, depending on your point of view – is the fact that, most of the time, it’s the bride who calls the shots on how the shots are handled.

She’ll drag her soon-to-be-husband off to spend a day or two at the photographer’s studio. The man with the camera, a trained professional, will tell them over and over to gaze endearingly into one another’s eyes and please ignore his assistant’s occasional snigger.

The betrothed do their awkward best to look like the model couples in the mail-order catalogues. They’re aware the pictures aren’t going to come out quite right, but they’ll obey every clich้ command and strike every obvious assembly-line pose just so they can end the agony sooner.

And then there’s Coco and Christian. They wanted to do the pre-nup publicity differently and, boy, did they succeed. Their photographer, from the very deliberately named Narakorn Prewedding Studio, shared the pictures on Facebook last week and everyone was agog – in a nice way. Evidently many damsels in event-planning distress are keen to get the same treatment ahead of their weddings.

The photographer reveals only that Christian is a Danish businessman who’s found his true love in Coco, a native of Sisaket in the Northeast. “When we asked them where they wanted to do the shoot, they said they wanted to do it at home. I thought they meant Denmark!”

Hah hah. No, they meant Sisaket, but they did have a different surprise for the cameraman — no wedding gown or tuxedo, no Barbie and Ken. They wanted to be photographed in costume and settings as Kwan and Riam, the doomed lovers in the classic Thai romantic tragedy “Plae Kao” (“The Scar”).

So Coco put on two pieces of cloth as a chong kraben and popped a flower in her hair. Christian is even more frugal in his attire, clad just in farmer’s short pants and a cotton scarf. His ample tummy is on ample display.

Coco’s family had a rice paddy handy and the day was sunny and hot enough to melt hearts. An albino water buffalo joined them. The pictures seem to come from one of the many movie adaptations of “Plae Kao”. Coco and Christian dip their toes in a pond and cuddle behind a pile of hay. And, yes, they do gaze into each other’s eyes in several frames. But the best shot features Christian “asking for Coco’s hand” in front of a crackling fire as the night turns cool.

Sweet nostalgia! The photos are beautiful to look at and earned rave reviews. “The most darling pre-wedding shoot I’ve ever seen,” one woman gushed.

It’s clear enough that Coco wanted to show Christian a good old-fashioned slice of Isaan rural life. We have to wonder, though, if she wasn’t also giving him a hint about all the hard work that lies ahead once he says his “I do”.

 

But the case of Nadech Kugimiya and Urassaya “Yaya” Sperbund remains a particularly hard one to crack even after they’ve been so obviously close for year – intimately so, in fact.

The two stars continue to insist their feelings for one another are akin to those of a “brother and sister”. Yeah, right.

Yes, they’ve been the hottest onscreen couple in show business ever since their mutual breakthrough in the 2010 TV soap “Duang Jai Akkanee”. A riot would probably break out if they ever decided to appear in separate series.

They’re always seen together. They always sit together at awards shows. They do fashion shoots together. They hang out together in their free time. And they never miss each other’s birthdays. They’re awfully close for a brother and sister.

Now there’s an Instagram photo kicking around that’s caused uproar. It was taken at Yaya’s 23rd-birthday party and shows her and Nadech holding hand under the table.

No it doesn’t, Yaya tells Sanook.com. “We weren’t actually holding hands. He was just placing his hand over mine – you know, to show support and good wishes.”

Yeah, right. And the ring on her ring finger? “It’s just an old ring that fits that finger best, so that’s where I wear it. I know people see a ring on that finger as symbol of engagement, but where I come from [referring to her family background] it doesn’t mean anything.”

Nadech was next to be grilled. How, he was coyly asked, has his relationship with Yaya developed over the years? “Oh, we’re doing great, like we always have. We’ve always been there for each other, supporting each other and taking care of each other, and I think it’s great that way.”

Time to take off the gloves: Is she your girlfriend? Are you dating? “Well, that’s up to you what to think.”

It’s a yes, then. Case closed.

Bird and his buffalo

There is nothing that superstar Thongchai “Bird” McIntyre hasn’t done in his marvellous career – except toiling in a farmer’s field. But he’s done that too now, sort of. He swaps his microphone for a hoe in the short film “Rak Kham Diew”, airing on One Channel 31 on Sunday night.

Inspired by Bird’s latest single of the same name, the producer invited him to “play himself in an alternate reality” – as a farmer labouring far, far from the big city. Bird has to deal with cruel nature’s whims to survive – and it’s all because of love.

“When I sing the song, it means something particular to me, so it’s interesting that the same song can be interpreted differently and translated into film,” he tells Siam Dara.

“If the power of love can make you do absolutely anything, why can’t it make me a farmer?” Actually the thought never occurred to us, but carry on.

“I won’t give too much away, but the film is about me working as a farmer for a few days. You’ll also see how people really live with nature, how we connect with each other through nature.

“For me it was a great experience, and I’m sure you’ll find it entertaining and educational at the same time.”

THE JUNTA JUST loves to poke around in our personal lives, but few will label Prime Minister Prayut Chan-o-cha a dictator just for making recommendations regarding our TV viewing.

At least it’s not some dreary show full of brass bands and sermonising – although it does tend to wave the flag rather a lot. The generalissimo says he’s seen the South Korean series “Descendants of the Sun” on TrueVisions Channel 232 and thinks Thai television producers would do well to emulate it.

Thais don’t need much encouraging when it comes to tuning in to South Korean TV dramas, and that includes “Descendants”, a hit for South Korean broadcaster KBS World. More than a billion people have seen it online.

Prayut suggested producers try something different like that, instead of the usual clich้-ridden plots endlessly repeated in Thai soaps, all sappy love and jealous rages.

The public’s initial surprise at the PM’s TV coaching segued into cheeky criticism, along the lines of “What’s a mighty warrior like him doing watching a soap opera made for women?” Maybe it’s because the protagonist is an army captain, someone surmised.

Captain Yoo Si-jin (played by Song Jungki) and lady doctor Kang Mo-yeon (Song Hyekyo) are members of a peacekeeping force in the fictional land of Uruk. Their romance is central to the plot, but there’s also plenty of primetime devoted to their circumstances in a foreign land, their careers, their duties and the fact that they have clashing views on almost all of these.

There’s something in the series that appeals to national leaders, and we’re betting it’s the flags. On Tuesday South Korean President Park Geun-hye was gabbing about the show with her top aides, Yonhap news agency reports. She thought it could be another great international pitch for Korean culture (as if the world doesn’t get enough of that already, thanks very much). This is the first South Korean drama to be aired simultaneously in China, she noted.

“Good cultural content can not only have economic and cultural value, but also contribute to the revitalisation of our tourism,” Park is quoted as saying. And this show’s also a dandy marketing tool for patriotism, she added.

Of course – and quite apart from Prayut‘s frequent television appearances – Thailand isn’t exactly suffering for lack of patriotic viewing. A generation has grown up alongside the mighty movie franchises of director MC Chatrichalerm Yukol, the Siamese warrior epics “Suriyothai” and “The Legend of King Naresuan”.

And on television the latest series to premiere, just last week, is surely one for PM Prayut‘s heart. “Jao Weha”, airing on True4U Channel 24 every Monday and Tuesday, has big stars Jessadaporn Pholdee, Atichart Chummanon and Andrew Gregson playing officers in the Air Force, Navy and Army, respectively.

When it comes to patriotism, Chief, we’ve already enlisted!